5 things I would tell myself about parenting

Sometimes I wish I could travel back to pre-baby time and give myself some pointers. I feel that I have learned a lot in these last 9 weeks that would have served me well to know from the beginning. So here they are, the 5 things I would want me to know. 

1. Do not pre-define your parenting style- You truly never know what you are going to be like as a mother. So don't hold yourself to any standards ahead of time. You may go in thinking you will be an epidural-getting, formula feeding, let them cry it out, kind of a mom. Then suddenly that baby is born without a drop of meds, you're breast feeding in public, and are pretty much the hallmark of attachment parenting. And you know what? Both styles (and anything in between) is totally acceptable!! Embrace you! Be flexible and forgiving to yourself. You'll find your rhythm. And you truly never know what it will be until you're living it. 

     I have made peace with formula :)

2. Don't neglect your basic needs- this is soooo easy to do! You'll get so caught up in the chaos of being a mom that you'll turn around and realize it's been 3 days since you showered and you can't remember the last time you ate a vegetable. You know how the airplane people tell you to put on your oxygen mask before you help others? Same concept. Take care of yourself. You'll be a better mom for it

3. Find a way to hang on to you- what I mean is that your whole world will change suddenly when your baby is born, but that doesn't mean that you have to loose yourself to it! It's hard, especially at first. But make time for those long bubble baths where you listen to three hours straight of your favorite radio show. Continue to totally geek out about the next episode of Bones. Those things are your pleasures, and they need to continue. 

4. Remember that it's all temporary- sometimes the sleepless nights, the worry, the emotions and stress feel like they have taken over and are there to stay. But it gets better. Slowly but surely it does. There really is a light at the end of the tunnel. For now, hunker down, drink some coffee and put one foot in front of the other. Before you know it that little bundle of squawks will be an active and smiling little nugget of pure joy (who also sleeps through the night! Yay!). The mountain of chaos and craziness will fade in to a distant blip. 

          Early morning exhaustion 

5. ASK. FOR. HELP.- trust me on this one. I know it's hard to admit that you may need it. It's also a bit embarrassing for your friends to see you and your house in such disarray. Ignore your pride and modesty.  

Day three after our little one was born some friends of ours dropped off hamburgers, watermelon, potato salad, and homemade chocolate chip cookies. I will never forget that meal. It literally saved us. My sister did my disgusting dishes and my mom a load of laundry. The other day my mother and sister in law kept the little one entertained while I took a (much needed) long and relaxing shower. People really do want to help. You just need to step up and tell them what you need.