Penny was a unique little dog that had made the trip to Helena from the LA County Humane Society by private charter plane. Packed in her kennel with dozens of other little dogs, she stared quietly and intently at us. She never barked, she didn't get up to jump on the bars. I knew immediately that she was the one.
We brought her home and soon discovered that Penny was very afraid of people. We couldn't so much as glance her way without her cowering, rolling on to her back and drizzling herself with her own urine. It was heart-wrenching. Obviously someone had hurt this little dog. We spent hours online reading about abused dogs and how to gain their trust. For the first week we completely ignored her. We let her get to know her surroundings and meet us from a safe distance. By the second week we could crouch down to her level, extend the back of our hand in her direction, avert our eyes, and (on a good day) she would stretch her neck out and sniff us. Slowly but surely her confidence grew. Little by little she let us pet under her chin (never the top of her head as that is too aggressive) and one day when I was napping on the couch she jumped up to lay next to me. Her tail began to move from it's petrified position tucked between her legs to more erect and alert. For Josh and I, it was the hardest we had ever worked to gain an animal's trust and every little improvemt was as rewarding as it was exciting.
I had always wondered about Penny's history and so (when I felt confident her nerves could handle it) I made a vet appointment to help us determine her age and any other significant findings an exam may give us. The vet told us she was barely a year old and had alreay had at least one litter of puppies. She was far too young to have already been a mom. And based on how she cowered, the vet confirmed our suspicions that Penny had not been treated well; most likely abused. It was around this time that my belly had started to grow with the expectance of our first baby. Penny immediately took to me. She loved to drape herself over my bump, and when the baby kicked Penny would sway and rock and bump up and down. We could still hardly look her in the eye, but she would happily take a pounding from the little human inside me.
By the time I was full-term Penny was fully warmed up to Josh and I. We could take her anywhere. From her nervousness came obedience. Penny knew we had saved her and she aimed to please. Still young, she played endlessly with Josh and her toys we had bought. Every night she snuggled into her bed.
I was getting curious to see how Penny would react when I went into labor. On the night the contractions began Penny stayed loyally at my side. She wasn't scared of my moans and seemed to be acutely aware of what was happening. I got the feeling that she had been expecting this. I was standing in the bathroom grasping the towel bar and working through the ever more intense contractions when I looked down and saw Penny. She was making full eye contact, a true rarity for her. She looked at me with her deep brown eyes and I felt a sense of love, calm, friendship and understanding I have rarely received from humans. She knew my struggle and she stood calmly by my side. When we left to the hospital I remember telling Josh breathlessly through my pain that I wish we could bring her along.
The day we brought Molly home, Penny greeted us at the door with a look of anticipation on her face. Ears perked, she immediately identified the car seat and anxiously awaited to look inside. When she quietly and gently sniffed Molly for the first time, Josh and I were astonished to see the look of knowing and familiarity that crossed Penny's face. She knew Molly and she had been expecting her.
Today, Penny is more involved in the care of Molly than I could have ever imagined. Every diaper change, every late night bottle- Penny is there. Josh and I joke that if Penny had thumbs she could babysit.
Penny has a purpose in life now. She has found a love and a reason for being. She now has a life in which she can feel and express love without fear.
She has taught me so much about what it means to overcome a painful past and to find hope.
Penny will forever hold an important spot in our family and in our hearts.
No comments:
Post a Comment